This blog, much like my life, took a left turn somewhere where previously there'd only been right turns. Since my last blog post, I was diagnosed wih Generalised Anxiety disorder, social anxiety, mild OCD and depression.
For me, the first three weren't that big of a deal; I'd dealt with them most of my life. But depression is another matter. It's cruel, heartless; debilitating. When in its deepest throes, I could barely get up in the morning. My kids ate a lot of leftovers and cereals. I screamed a lot. Cried even more. And although thoughts of suicide never entered my mind, I understood with perfect clarity why some people ended their lives in the name of depression. I understood and forgave.
The last week of September will mark one year of being on antidepressants. One year of speaking up about mental illnesses. One year of doing my part in destroying the stigma.
Although I've heard - through the grapevine - that some Facebook friends are putt off by the amount …
Last January, my husband and I celebrated 3 years of marriage, nine years of relationship.He and I have been through a lot through the years; he was the one who discovered I dislike change. He patiently talked me through my panic attacks. His presence and patience were the reasons I'd decided to have kids even though I was adamant I'd never have any.When my illnesses were diagnosed, he didn't understand them. He realised I wasn't making it all up, but couldn't grasp what it all meant. Yet he knew to give me space when needed. Knew to take charge of the kids when I couldn't cope anymore. He would send me to bed, light a candle and cover me with my anxiety blanket, left me to calm down. Sometimes it took 5 minutes, other times it took hours.Last April we filed for divorce.We'd been rocky for some time he and I. Somewhere during our relationship, our love lives parted ways. And although we were still the best of friends, we both needed more out of the other, a…
Getting my diagnosis for my illnesses, speaking out about them, publishing my highs and lows on Facebook has not been as hard as admitting this: I've discovered my spirituality.
Tarot, Guides, Messengers, Third Eye, Intuition, Meditation, numerologie, connections, crystals, psychics, readings, books, boards, angels. Name it; I'm into it.
I've always believed in spirituality but it all changed for me when I met a particularly good psychic last June. Her words to me were life altering.
Since her, I've had two tarot readings done which confirmed for me what the psychic had said. For many reasons, I won't say what they told me. For one, it's personal. For two, it involves other people. And three, I'm not here to convince you intuition and everything that comes with it exists. I'm simply to tell you that, once again, my life has taken a different path. A path of light, of love, of clairvoyance.
A month back, I followed a friend into a bookstore for a gift. H…