I gave birth December 12th 2011 to a beautiful 9 pound baby boy.
It was a good thing I wasn't expecting anything during labour, had not decided I wanted to give birth this way or that, or I would have been sorely disappointed.
What I had planned, was to deliver in a birthing home with my midwife. That didn't happen. When my water broke, my contractions started right away and I ended up at the birthing home with Sam. Everything was going well until she decided to listen to my baby's heart and heard an irregular beat. She immediately called the ambulance and had us tranferred to the hospital for a closer monitoring. My baby had slight arrhythmia.
They kept me at the hospital, which is where I gave birth, but with my midwives. It was a natural birth with no epidural. And it was very painful. When I think of getting pregnant and subsequently giving birth again, part of my insides shrivel up and die. I'm told I will forget this pain. Still waiting.
I hemorrhaged and was kept under surveillance for 2 days, which is when they released me with a bad case of anemia. They did not release baby Liam who was under observation for arrythmia, jaundice and hypoglycemia. We ended up staying at the hospital for a week.
It was an interesting week. I was able to recuperate because he was being kept in the nursery for observation. The nurses would come get me every 3 hours to feed him, and helped with the breastfeeding. We were taught to give him a bath, and to care for his basic needs. Then, they sent us home with an almost clean bill of health.
His heartbeat is still irregular but they aren't worried as many babies are born with this. Still, not easy on new parents to see their newborn plugged to machines, constantly.
I think going home was the hardest. We weren't being guided anymore, weren't on a schedule and were left to fend for ourselves. Sam's a fantastic father: I honeslty couldn't have done anything of this without him. He was there 150% for labour and everything that followed, and that includes my hormones.
Being a new mom is hard, and you're constantly second guessing yourself. It's part of the learning process, I'm told.
But now that three weeks have passed, I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm looking forward to the time spent with my son, to breastfeeding. To watch him curl up against me as he falls asleep. To have his tiny hands curl into my hair or touch my cheek.
I am truly blessed. I hope you are all well.
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